you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize