it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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