remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
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