I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize
