That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
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