i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
