KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
