I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
