I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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