So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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