My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
