Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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