Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
