Clothes are such an inconvenience.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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