Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Randomize
