how can u be prego again
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
