I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
it glows. i had to have it.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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