wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Randomize
