How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Randomize
