I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I just found puke in my bra..
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
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