You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
