You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Randomize
