u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
