it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
