i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
soo... how was my night?
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
