What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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