I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
