drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
