you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Randomize
