Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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