i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
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