Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Randomize