You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Randomize
