Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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