Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Randomize
