Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Randomize
