you guys were way drunker than both of me
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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