i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
