what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Randomize
