I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
