I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Is it because I queefed?
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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