a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
