So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
he fucked my hip out of place.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
