Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize
