This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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