I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Randomize
