If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
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