Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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