Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
