She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
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