I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize