Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
