margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
